#Hangry One-Liners

*Eats snack while looking for another snack*

1. Sometimes I’m hungry and other times I’m asleep.

2. What do you call a sad coffee? Depresso.

3. Just binge watched a whole pizza. ~@meganamram

4. My rap name is Lil Hungry.

5. I hate when I try to order a salad and my mouth says “I’ll have a double Quarter Pounder with Cheese.” ~@jimgaffigan

6. Turning vegan is a big missed steak.

7. I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge.

8. Avocado: not ripe
Avocado: not ripe
Avocado: not ripe
Avocado: I’M RIPE NOW
Avocado: okay you were in the bathroom so I rotted.

9. If you think eggplant is good, you should try any other food, it’s much better. ~jakeandamir

10. Going for a walk because I want to stay healthy. Taking along a box of M&Ms because let’s be honest here.

11. Carrots are a great thing to eat when you are hungry and want to stay that way. ~@marawritesstuff

12. Just ate a salad when I could’ve eaten a cheeseburger. Where’s my reward? I should get an award, right? Maybe a cheeseburger.

13. Not sure if I actually like movies or just like looking at something while I eat popcorn. ~@dawn_m_

14. I’m not good at cooking, but I’m good at being around when food appears. ~@robertbuscemi

15. “You just ate Chinese food, am I right?” – The world’s worst fortune cookie. ~@sadmonsters

16. Most people don’t realize this, but you can eat organic, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you. ~@jennyjohnsonHi5

17. Someone who drank too much coffee decided on the spelling of the word “Coffee.” ~@jimgaffigan

18. When one door closes, another one opens. And then closes. And then opens. It’s the fridge. It’s me in front of the fridge. ~@abbyhasissues

19. My new diet is to pay people to tell me how thin I look. ~@michaelianblack

20. Hello. It’s me. I was wondering if after all these years you’d like to eat. ~@brent2smith


Would you like a second helping? Click here to see 30 hilarious one-liners.

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